Saturday, December 17, 2011

"It's just a season"

I was so thankful that Clint looked after the kiddos so I could go to our church's women's conference a couple of weeks ago. The lady who taught at the conference really encouraged us to LOVE Christ more, even in the little moments; those mommy-frustrated moments, those moments where the juice spills on your freshly mopped floor and you can't find the pink sandals that were there just a minute ago so you can leave for church on time. Or when you find out that your daughter took off her underwear to use the loo, and didn't put them back on, and you find this out AT church when she's wearing JUST A DRESS! Yikes. Oh yes, this did happen to me, TWICE.

But that it's more important to LOVE Christ in that moment than to give into the sigh, even the inward sigh when your situation tests your limits. The joy of loving Christ should outshine your desire to sin by complaining in your heart, or externally to your kids.

It was really awesome.

But there was one thing she said that I couldn't get over.

She said that the phrase "It's just a season" should never be used by mommies. This hit me like a brick out of nowhere. Really? I thought. I use that all the time! She mentioned that a husband she knew once told his wife to never use that phrase because it was like she was complaining that she really didn't like where she was, and she just wasn't happy with what the Lord had given her, and wanted another season life. A different season to come, and she was just enduring this one.
It made me think hard about how and why I use the phrase "It's just a season." And I discovered that I think it's not always wrong to use it. I use it to help myself gain perspective. It's not complaining, it's just me trying to see the place that I'm in, with three small children, and know that "this is the season" for me to be fully devoted to child-rearing. I have 3 children who are not in school, who need me the whole day. Thinking about the season I'm in helps me to not be discontent at all the other things I could be doing. That because my children are small this is the season that I must choose to say no to alot of things that pull me away from my home, to say yes to raising our kiddos the way we think God would call us to.
My husband is a pastor, so I often feel like I'm not the typical "pastor's wife" who plays piano, serves tea, teaches all the ladies, hosts elegant dinners, does door-to-door missions, sews quilts, visits widows. etc. etc. Sometimes I feel like I'm not doing enough for the Kingdom because I'm "just" changing diapers, doing laundry etc. My husband has to often remind me that my ministry is right in front of my nose. If I'm so focused on "ministry" but forget my real ministry...(my home and family) that this is the SEASON (yes, I said season!) that I must be fully devoted to raising these little guys in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
Lately I've run into alot of women in their 40s where their kids are grown, at school, or out of the house. They are in the season with more time on their hands to do ministry or go to gym or to the mall or have a cup of hot coffee, or go out with their husband more than twice a year for a date. But they look at my small children and say, "They grow up so fast, enjoy every moment." And a few have told me how they wished that they had had more babies, and now it's too late.
It is the season where I don't fit into my skinny jeans, and my coffee is normally luke warm by the time I get to it, and I can't do a lot of ministry alongside my husband... but that's OK! It's GOOD for me to remind myself it's just a season, a short while where my priorities aren't jeans and a cup of joe. But rather my priority is the three little faces that look at me everyday, knowing that I'm the one showing them what it looks like to walk with my Savior, whether by good or bad example. So the convenience and coffee pale in comparison.


pandy said...

Thanks for posting this, Kim...a good reminder and great encouragement. Your kiddos are adorable. :)

The Mom said...

Hi Kim, you wrote this so well, once again writing what has been in my heart and on my mind. I have been convicted recently about the sighing and complaining that goes on in my heart. Even if it is hidden from my husband and children it is still sinful and I must not do it! I agree with your conclusions about the "seasons" phrase. I am thankful for the reminder to persevere through the tired days and sleepless nights, knowing that the LORD willows bring relief and different challenges in a new season. But, as I read your post I realized how easy it could be to use that phrase in the wrong way, as the lady spoke of. It was a good encouragement to me to make sure that useing the "seasons" phrase is not just another way for me to express discontentment.

Thank you again!

G&S said...

Stumbled on your blog from Daisy's blog Kim. So sweet to see all the updated pics of your lil' family! Encouraging about the "it's just a season" write up too, with our recent third...good reminders for me. Sending my love, Shilo (Ex-TMS Secretaries rock!)